Mattlog

Flashback

Back in the 80's two girls were vying for our hearts and our collective allowances. Their names were Tiffany and Debroah Gibson. And these two teeny boppers sang their way onto the airwaves with great voices and fresh songs. And their rivalry would last the ages.....

Okay maybe not. But I know that I owned ... I hate saying this... BOTH of their CD's. Tiffany's self titled albumn with the Beatles cover I Saw Him Standing There (A little gender switching never killed a song) and of course my 8th grade dance theme "Could've Been" where I danced with a girl named Becky. Debbie's release Out of the Blue had "Shake Your Love" and her ballad... Foolish Beat. Can you believe I actually remember this? It's sad. I know.

But the way I always but these two into categories was that in ten years Tiffany would be the one posiong in Playboy and Debbie would still be rocking strong. One wholesome the other ... not so.

It's like the original difference between Britney and Christina. Christina was dirty and Britney was... not. Course then they took cues from each other....

And then Debbie released Electric Youth (which I didn't own) but had the awesome ballad "I get Lost In Your Eyes." And Tiffany disappeared.

>Then years later it happened as I said it would. Debbie was doing Beauty and the Beast on Broadway and in the April issue Tiffany took her clothes off in playnoy and showed off her bit too ample bosom. All was right with the world and more importantly I was right.

And for 3 years I was... I could live with the glory of knowing I had it all figured out...

Now I'm wrong. Courtesy of Eonline:

Apparently, Debbie Gibson is trying to revive her electric youth.

Gibson, now 34 and known as Deborah, has turned down offers to pose nude in the past.

How can she do this? She was the good one... supposed to stay true to the good girl that made her sweet and hot and great! Tiffany could never have pulled off "I get Lost in Your Eyes!"

I mean yeah, she looks pretty good. I mean, she wasn't bad when I had her on my walls next to The Alyssa Milano Shrine... but I mean could she...

Be hot... I mean she looks good but she was the one who was supposed to stay good! And just cause she's got a single entitled "Naked" You don't think she could pull off....

Well, I'll be purchasing that!

Matt

Friday

Er.... go Pats. Despite the dynasty that will arise once the Pats have taken the Super Bowl but what a crazy time to be a Boston Sports Fan. Red Sox then the Pats. There's a year they thought they'd never see.

I mean the best pick up the Pats has this year was Cory Dillion. I mean the one thing they needed was a running back to a bit of pressure of Tom Brady and they get a great one for a ... excuse me... third round draft pick... it's too amazing.

My girlfriend is out of town. She's college shopping. Her dad's taken to Arkansas. She's a tried and true UT girl but her father was a razor back and he wants his daughter to be too. She knows the UT fight song... I know I've started a season and they play it all the time and she starts singing away.

So while she's away Ryan and I are on an adventure. Resident Evil is not only seriously addicting but hard. And more importantly fun. And even more importantly... juuusssst creepy. Ryan's had a lot more time to play than I.... I've got the girlfriend you see... and smome of the stuff I've had to see him solve and play is just awesome.

In the original games you hit a cut scene it's time to take a swig of beer or eat some of the chips you've had sitting on the table.... but in this game suddenly in the middle of a cut scene you have to press simultaneously the L1 and R1 buttons. You're on your toes is all I'm saying. :)

Tomorrow night Ryan gets his first taste of the Spike and Mike animated film festival. I went last year laughed and was horrorified. But if you can't put up with a cartoon cloud and his bleeding anus you have no sense of humor. Ryan walked out of the room when I showed him that... but it's funny! Anyway, he and Jeff and I are going. It's gonna be great.

Well Monday I'll post stuff on that and more weekend musings... till then keep your feet in the sky and your head in the clouds... but only if they aren't anally bleeding.

Ashlee Simpson

I'm gonna be honest here a minute. This blog was going to be about lip-synching. But in the end it's about Ashlee Simpson and how she should not be a star.

A star should be someone who can sing... Ashlee Simpson cannot sing. And I'm not going out on a limb here with personal opinion... if you've seen anything (I've seen 10 minutes) of Ash's documentary show on MTV you'll see in the making of her albumn episode that she in fact cannot sing. Some able bodied editor took the bits she got right and spliced them together to make a reasonable sounding albumn. That editor should win a Grammy.

So when she hits the Orange Bowl live and can't sing and when she's caught lip synching on SNL then it only comes out as obvious to me that the poor cannot sing and should really stop. No matter what you wanna say about Avril Lavigne at least I've seen her do an acoustical version of live in school gym of some of her songs. Ash should never try such a thing.

More proof is that this exists. The Stop Ashlee Simpson Petition has come about. It's been rumoured her label has said if they get 100,000 signatures they'll not let her record again. Last time I looked it neared 200,000. I have found no reputible truth to the rumour how sad would that be for a performer where your lable just says "Ehh, your done. Hundreds of thousands of people took the time out of their lives to stop your from singing another damn song. Go live off the money you've already made and never come back."

I come from a musical theater background. A study was done once and it proved that musical theater singers and dancers put as much effort into a show as a fottball player on game day. Part of the reason people lip synch their concerts is so that in all the little dance moves they do for an hour and a half they won't be out of breath singer their songs.

Madonna admits to it... but why would I want to see someone lip synch a song... I can see the austin Air Guitar Championships if I want to see someone fake it. Part of the Reason Miss Aguilera does slow songs in her show is so that she can not only belt a Beautiful song but so that she can take it down and not force herself to dance for 90 minutes. Which is not to say she NEVER lip synchs ... but what's important is that in the clutch situation... hitting talk shows or doing a half time show or going on SNL you need to be able to sing your way through a freaking song.

In other news you may have noticed a bunch of crap showing up in my comments. Most if it's in the older section of the blog arena... Jeff and I are working on taking it most of it out... however the system is not infallible and some of your comments may disappear. I'm sorry. Buzz I know I deleted one of your comments on the last entry. Feel free to repost... it was on topic and funny... cause you know you are.

That's all... on Friday we'll talk Pats football.

Matt

Wierd Week

Been a wierd week heance no entries. I was back in the back of house which I haven't worked in a few months. And compared to these Mexicans we got in the coutnry I am a slow individual. Our day broil cook can handle any thing. I get more than 7 or 8 items on my screen and I'm quoting Johnny Cash. "I went down down down in a burning ring of fire." Except that the ring of fire consists of French Onion soup, Quesadillas and Pasta. Oh and garlic bread.

So I've been fairly bushed all week. THe other odd occurance was having actual nights off. These were spent with my regular working buddies like Jeff and Cecil and of course, my darling girlfriend.

Speaking of my darling, I made mention of her last week doing something awesome. And a few e-mails have told me I need to explain what that was lest some people with very dirty minds thik other things. :)

Well we have a mere 115 days before the opening of the best movie of 2005. NO! It's not War of the Worlds with Tom Cruise and directed by Stephen Speilberg. And it's not Hitchhiker's Guide nor is it Batman Begins or even Mr. and Mrs Smith (which all look fabulous.) Of course, faithful readers will know it's Star Wars Ep III.

No since May 19th is right around the corner I asked Kristen which of the Star Wars movies had she seen. And her answer may shock you. (Sit down to be prepared)

"none of them."

None? How can anyone in this world live and not have seen Star Wars? Only to find out the next day I have a 40 year old manager who has never seen any of them either? Kurt how could you?

So the obvious question arises... which path do I take her down? Do I start her as the rest of us did by watching Eps 4-6... or do I go nuts and start with Ep. 1 and let her follow the amazing story.

And for those people like myself who have grown up watching Star Wars and knowing it line by line and know stupid facts like the fact that Han had saved Chewie from an Imperial Slave Camp and that's why Chewie has his life Debt with Han.

What a sociological experiment to take someone NEW to Star Wars and just go down the list. Eps 1-6. How crazy to just watch ever movie get better and better.

So I sat her down with my new 5.1 stero system I got for Christmas and we watched Ep. 1.

Firstly, she liked it. Secondly, she liked Jar-Jar. Well, at least she liked it. She got a little sniffly when Ani left Shmi on Tat. And was creeped out totally by Darth Maul. (As well she should be.)
So the step down the path has begun. I'm excited this month we'll watch EP II and some time before May 19 we'll watch them both again... and then she'll see 4-6. And how aweseom will that be.

My girlfriend rules. ;)

Later this week thoughts on the Patriots, lip synching and more on writing.

Lastly, the death of Johnny Carson causes me pause. When people disappear from view it becomes hard for people to remember. Especially when like JOhnny you spent almost every night in people's homes for thirty years. I wonder that if Johnny's passing hit people like it did when they tuned in the next Monday night of the Tonight Show and seeing Jay Leno and his giant chin hosting. Well Johnny's and Icon in my mind. And even though I haven't shelled out the 60 bucks to buy the Best Of DVD's the memories of illnesses and Anniversary Shows and eventual respect for the work he did behind the desk night after night is still a giant impression on me. His dry wit has rarely been surpassed. Well, here's hope Johnny one the spot behind the desk up in heavan and he's currently holding and envelope to his head and says "Saddam, Osama, and OJ." Ripping open the envelope blows into it pulls out the card and says "Three people who won't be joining me up here."

One More Piece Of Shocking News....

I didn't turn on the XBOX all day. Maybe it was my brother pointing out that perhaps I needed an intervention. Maybe it was my desire to leave the house for the first time in days but I didn't touch it. Amazing. And now I'm off to bed.

Watched the first disk of Return of the King Special edition. The opening scene with Saruman makes it almost worth it. But the few other added scenes like Aragorn's attack of the fleet on the river and Foromir's scene with Perry... makes the first disk alone worth the purchase.... what the extras and disk 2 have in store for me I can only wait. Night.....

Hurtin' PT. 2

Nothing will ever make NOT want to have kids then being in a doctor's office. After about 15 minutes no kid can sit still. I saw kids playing with chairs I saw kids falling off chairs. I saw one kid open a magazine take out the card stock reorder form tear into ten pieces (she counted) then leave the mess on the floor. The mother asked her twice to pick up and neither times did she. I don't understand how kids fell they can act like idiots anywhere they want to. For instance some nights when I'm working the restaraunt there will be kids just running around. 3 or 4 of them just terroizing other customers.

Parents? What are you teaching your kids? I learned where to behave and where not to. The thing for me was the restaraunts are a special event and if I wanted to contiue being allowed these special events I must behave in a manner that would want my parents to bring me back.

But I forget, I guess, these must be the same parents calling up my teacher friends asking why there kids have to pick up after themselves. "isn't that your job they ask?"

But that's a whole other rant I could write about bad parenting. I guess since I was raised if a fairly normal household I understand something about respect and manners,

The next following the doc's office the thing is still huge. And the pressure is building on the inside of my cheek. I mean, it's painful. I lie in bed reading most of the day because somehow when you're in pain and whiny being in bed is the best place to be.

Kristen showed up at some point and all I did was whine to her. I couldn't even kiss her cause it hurt to purse my lips. Something else awesome happened with her that night but that's the next blog. Let's just say it involves Star Wars. Tune in soon for this one. (124 days till EP III by the way.)

She leaves after consoling me while I whine like a baby. I flip through tv watching nothing. Somehow when your sick you can watch hours of nothing. I can't even recall now what it was. Lileks mentioned that the other day. He watched Species II I'll prolly just watched reruns of That 70's Show.

And I couldn't sleep, the pain would wake me ver couple of hours and I prolly got thre to four hours over a 8 hour period.

Day IV of Lumpy Jaw weeks contuied and I again didn't leave the house. However a break through was made.

*** WARNING MORE GROSS STUFF AHEAD*****

The head of the small potato growing in my cheeks was actually white. DId this mean that it could pop. Well I gave it some help, too a pair of tweezers and pulled. And that hurt a lot. But pus started flowing.... not as much I was expecting. I was expecting like sitting in the front row of a Gallagher concert while he's using the Sledg-O-Matic on a couple of dozen of cream filled donuts. But it made me happy that at least some of the pressure might be off.

***** END GROSSNESS******

This did not relieve the pressure and it only hurt more. Probaly the broken sking adding pain to the pressure. In any case I called into work, partially because of the pain, partially cause of lack of sleep, but mostly, because if I was a customer I wouldn't want my server to be all pussey. <- That's supposed to an adjective describing some one who is full of pus. It just looks wrong.

At anyrate, I spent the night watching Spiderman 2 extras (of which there's a lot) and I even caught Charlie Rose on PBS interviewing Geroge Lucas. Interesting interview I'll probably mention in my next Star Wars post.

So today was Day V of Gee Wouldn't it Be Great to Have this Pocket of Pus of your Face. I hadn't left the house in two days and was getting pretty antsy. I finally got about 10 hours of sleep. And sleep I've always said is the miracle cure. I slept like a baby. Took a shower this morning. More Pus flowed. And I had no pain all day long. Kristen came over about 3 and we drove around running a few errands and getting some food. I'm still a little hesitant about people actually seeing this cherry growing uunder my skin but I HAD to get out of the house.

Upon return we hung out for a while still not kissing because mostly, who'd want to kiss me with this thing anyway. After she leaves Ryan and I pull a double feature. White Noise at the Tinseltown and a sneak preview of House of FLying Daggers at the Alamo. Two reviews which will be posted this weekend.

All in all, a much better day, will probably even be ready to work tommorow night at 4. That'll be nice to go back to work. And I'll be making some dough tomorrow. Cause, you know, I gotta.

Matt

Hurtin....

Sunday night, I was still sportin my Christmas goatee... mostly, out of laziness. I mean you know how it is... it's over break no responsibilities might as not shave just so that's one last thing. THen of course, I return home and my cool girl says I'm "so hot" with the goatee so I keep it cause if she's happy then you know I am.

Ladies I understand you not wanting to shave your legs.... I freak out tackling my face I can't imagine a 2 foot leg.

S the goatee, I must admit is looking good until Sunday, as I was saying when I noticed a little lump the size of a marble. So I trim off the beard and it doesn't look good. But I like 10 years ago has a cyst growing on my face and I thought that maybe I could wait until my insurance clicks in on Feb 1. *note to anyone stalking me, wait to drive the shiv in my side until then*

So the next I wake up around 1, as is my way on days when I'm in at 5, and it's twice the size it was before and now it's a little sore. After a refreshing shower I hop in the car stop into work to show then the chew I'm dippin' and they send me to the local clinic. Well this ends up taking a good hour and by three o 'clock there no longer accepting walk-ins.

"But I have a thing on my face." I say, dead pan.

NO jokester this recpetionist. "Yes," she says in that gruff but polite voice that only a receptionist can get away with it. "We have an opeing at 11:45."

"I'll take it."

I'm popping aspirin like crazy now cause it hurts. SO I'm at work and when people ask I just explain that it's the third eyeball growing out of my jaw. Better to keep track of what I'm eating. No one buys it. I think it's funny. And Kristen pleads, "stop, it's not that bad."

"This is my defense mechinism. When I'm a bit worried about things I joke about them."

By the end of the night... it's bigger. I'm eating a hamburger. I explain my worry is now doubled by the fact I'm probably feeding it. It will only get bigger.
"Stop," Kristen tries. I can't help it, babe.

Next day, doctor's office. There's a couple of blog's here. What I'll say is that sitting in the office you ever look at somebody and think, wow, they need a doctor... only to realize *I'M THAT GUY*

I'm getting some stares. I continue freehandedly writing this.

******WARNING IT GETS A LITTLE GROSS HERE, PEOPLE LIKE ken SHOULD LOOK AWAY.*************

In the doc's office, she comes and with a great bedside manner. She's amazed it won't pop. Infected pimple. She grabs a needle and starts poking at it. Just a little puss. Now she starts squeezing it and I'm deep breathing. It's still not really popping. "Well, I amazed." When you freak out a doctor, you kow you're in trouble.

****END grossness*****

It's like Jerry Seinfeld said. You never want to get an operation where you're in one of those auditoriums that's also an OR. You never want them to do anything to you where other doctor's are saying, "I gotta see that."

I get a scrip for anti-biotics. I'm taking them.

Like still sicks, but more on that tomorrow.

Matt

Moment of AWESOMENESS! http://www.montypythonsspamalot.com

MLB

Well I started looking ahead tonight to the baseball season. Not that my girlfriend cares... college football is her game. Longhorn fan. So she almost cried twice during the Rose Bowl but that all disappeared as Dusty Mangum's 37 yard field goal sailed over the goal post. She's already started her countdown to next years season. No other sport exists for her. But she'll be a Cub fan before the season is over. Oh she will be. *rubs hands maniacally*

But anyway, looks like Sammy will be around another season. Imagine no one wanting to pick up his 17 million dollar contract. The Mets decided to go for Carlos Beltran instead. Which leads me to my rant... Why the hell would Carlos Beltran want to play for the fucking Mets?

Scuse the F-bomb there... but I felt it was necessary. Why right now would anyone want to play for the Mets? I can't remember their last winning season. Last their 71-91 record is much to behold. At least the Cubs had a winning season. But there's no mystique in being a Mets. They're like the Yankees bastard step child.

And being a Yankee I could understand (almost.) Putting on Yankee Pin Stripes would be quite the thrill. Rather like being a Red Sox and first walking on to Fenway field. But a Met?

We all know it comes down to ca$h. The Cubs put their bid in on Beltran for 5 years and $58 million. But does anyone in the league play for a team because they want to anymore. Mark Grace stayed with the Cubs as long as they'd let him. As did Ryne Sandberg, who made his way into Canton, Ohio this week.

But what happened to the day when you were in Beltran's position and you could just say, "you know, I wanna be a Cub. They need help." No instead it's "Let's be a met cause their offer is 10 million more than anyone."

I mean I understand the love of the almighty dollar. I'm a guy who just wants stuff. Just nutty stuff. You know, like health insurance and a car I can trust to drive me over 20 miles. :) But once you've made 50 million how much more god damn money can you possibly need?

In other news, I can't stop playing the damn XBOX. I've even started playing the tennis game that came with it. It's really good. I don't even like tennis. But XBOX magazine gave it a 9.0 The only thing I've ever liked about tennis is well, Anna. And while I'm at it, let's take another hot look at Anna.

Ahhhhh. Anna. Yeah she's probably a bitch but .... *sigh*

Anyway, it's not a bad game. It took me about an hour to even win a game... not a mtch just a game. It took probably 15 minutes to hit a ball back... let alone volley. But I've started a career, looks remarkably like my girlfriend (the girls don't hit as hard as the guys) and I won my first tourney.

Been having problems with service pack 2. Evil Spyware was the cause. So I'm using Microsoft's beta of their new Antispyware. And it's awesome.

So finally getting service pack 2 installed meant I can finally use my dazzle software I got for Christmas. So expect a couple of video posts in the coming weeks.

Till then TTFN- Ta ta for now.

Matt

Happy New Year!

Well, what a crazy year 2005 will be.

I dunno why. I mean with the release of Ep III that should be enough.

2005 is going to be a turning point in my life... it's all part of a three plan I have. It's time to, you know, shit or get off the pot, as the expression goes.

My New Years was kinda quiet, AJ , some friends came over we battled on Halo for a while, kissed my lady friend at midnight, and talked. I think I had maybe four beers. Budweiser select, I should add. The best low carb on the market. I actually like the taste, cause god knows I don't need low carb anything.... but it's like Amber Boch light. At least that's what it tastes like to me. XXXtina called it the beer in between Bud and Bud light.

At anyrate, I've decided as a New Years resolution (besides that whole turning point thing) is to learn as much about football as I can. I was in two fantasy leagues this year. I was in Aj and Julie's league where I got my ass handed to me and the other where I took second. It's all about that initial draft. I mean, you maybe ab;le to find some players or rookies who show up out of now where and have a good year. But winning team consisted of Ladianian Tomlinson, Tiki Barber, and Brett Favre. Those three alone one the season for me. War horses. That's what they're called.

Anyway, so I know a 4-3 defense and what Nickel D looks like... but I want to know the ins and outs. Why a Nickel package, why does the Cover 2 always leave the middle vulnerable for a pass, and why do they always try to run it up the middle out of the I?

So I'll be picking up some good reading on that subject.

That's all for now, hope you all have a great year.

Matt